Last week I saw a house that I really kind of liked....except for one fatal design flaw-the bathroom. The upstairs bathroom had no shower just a GIANT soaker tub. A tub I might have needed a step stool to get in and out of. They had just remodeled the bathroom too. Why couldn't their remodel have looked a little like this one over at Adventures of Renovating a Brooklyn Limestone? The owners of giant tub house said they would take out the giant tub and put in a shower in the bathroom at their expense....hmmm. Let's think about this....
Last week, I mentioned how Bacon's drinking might explain his erratic behavior. This weekend, Bacon woke up on Saturday morning and had some apologizing for his behavior the night before to do.
Isn't that the sign of a problem?
here he is checking out the selection of beverages.
The night got a little crazy and Bacon may have gotten a little morally casual.
Bacon and Diddy. Heather and I are planning the commitment ceremony for these two.
Bacon got his first taste of lovin' and no dog was safe. Poor Lizzie. (You can check out some video at Green Dog Wine of Bacon terrorizing the party and in particular Lizzie.)
look at the crazed look in his eyes...wait, that's what he always look like
Thanks go out to Katrina for the photos of Bacon's debauchery. (She sent the photos with the subject line "crazy kid at the playground" and I hate to admit, that is exactly what he's like. He's kind of a bully and I know where that behavior comes from but he's also very forward with members of the opposite sex (and even a member or two of the same sex) and I have no idea where that comes from.)
Extra special thanks go out to Alicia, her pup Grady-the man of the hour, and her mom (who really is some kind of dog whisperer) for hosting the BYOD (bring your own dog/dish/drink). I barely got to talk to Katie and Alycia because of the craziness. It was our first pup party. Based on his behavior, I think it might be while until Bacon is invited back to any parties...
I almost ended up with another Boston Terrier the other night-at least temporarily. The little man got out of his house a few streets over and was wandering the neighborhood with no collar on. He was super friendly and got right in a neighbor's car as he had the door open as the neighbor was getting some stuff out of the car. Then the pup started following Bacon and I as we walked down the street. He was super friendly and you could tell he was someone's pet. The neighbor and I kind of stood there thinking what we should do (and I was contemplating taking him home so at least he was safe) when we started to hear whistling. It was Bammer's owner looking for him. She looked frantic and was so happy to have found him, safe and sound. I too was relieved to have reunited owner and pup since I really don't need two Bacon's in my life. And if you have ever met or seen Bacon in action, you would know what I mean....
Am I the only one watching the Real Housewives of DC? While they are not nearly as exciting or tacky as their NJ counterparts (which I really can't wait for the reunion on Monday---holy hell, this might be the most excited I have been for a tv show in a long time), they are still action packed full of fake drama and a lot of crazy.
Most of the crazy comes from these two:
Tareq and Michaele Salahi.
They made the news a few months back for crashing a White House dinner. And they appear to be bat-shit crazy and wearing too much bronzer.
I mean he would have to be crazy to wear a Cosby sweater in the year 2010 (or even 2009 if that's when this was filmed). Do you know who I see wearing Cosby sweaters these days? The homeless guys on Public Square who have no teeth and rant about Jesus.
Now, I don't have much love for most of the "housewives", I do love Mary. More so, I love Mary's hair (maybe because in it's natural state it looks a little like mine) and her willingness to look like this on camera.
Mary's hair goes from eh to fabulous with a little product and probably some help from her friend Ted Gibson--who I think is an honorary housewife this season.
Occasionally I read Style Me Pretty because I really like to look at photos of people I don't know and judge (I mean, admire) them on their wedding choices. There are some beautiful things on that site and even a few that I may have saved as ideas for my wedding--that isn't anywhere close to happening. I am not sure when I turned in to a girl with a wedding folder in her google reader but it happened.
This is not one of the photos I saved as a good idea. This photo hurt my feelings. Why did the bride do this to her bridesmaids? Those girls are skinny and the short dress and cowboy boots only make their knees look fat. And horizontal strips on the hips...that's just downright mean. This girl does not like her friends. Or she is wicked insecure.
A few weeks back I talked about the stuff I store in my bra. One thing I won't be storing in there anymore, my nano. There are actually two reasons, I won't be tucking the nano in to my bra strap on runs. One is because the nano isn't really working anymore. Two is because apparently I sweat too much. I sweat enough that the nano got water damage and that's the reason the screen is wonky and the play button only works half the time. Guy at the genius bar told me that there was significant water damage to the nano....um, yeah buddy that's from my boob sweat (ok, technically shoulder sweat but boob sweat sounds so much better than shoulder sweat).
So Nikki, you win- I won't be storing stuff in my bra anymore. Lesson learned.
I watch a ton of bad, guilty pleasure television, most of it on Bravo. But I save my Thursday nights for MTV...the Jersey Shore. I admit my love for this show loudly and proudly. Mike, the Situation, making Sunday dinner for the "family"?! How cute is that? The dude is a total douche about 99.9% of the time and then he tells Angelina he will make her some chicken tenders when they get home from the club. But the real reason I watch is not because I need to watch J-Wow's boobs grow every episode. I watch for Vinny. Vinny in glasses, Vinny at the gelateria, Vinny fist pumping with pit stains (google "Vinny Jersey Shore" and you can find the photos). He's the least oompa loompa of the bunch.
I don't like house hunting very much. Sure those first 20 houses were fun...I mean you get to look at people's stuff and judge them. Then it becomes sad-because sometimes people selling their house is not a fun occassion. Next is frustrating. I haven't moved out of the frustrating part of the equation. I can't find a house I like, let alone love and want to buy and spend the next 30 years paying off. If I kind of like the house, it's one block from I-90 and sounds like the freeway runs across your front porch (well, because it kind of does). If the house is in a good location, the house is most surely going to suck. And if it's in a good location and the price is good, I am pretty sure I am going to be afraid to open any closets or go in to the basement for fear there is going to be a dead body in there.
I kind of think the house is hiding somewhere along with my future husband---I was never all that good at hide and seek or my favorite pool game:
It you have color hair, I am going to save you $12 when I tell you: Don't waste your money!!! Buy yourself some new nail polish or a whole bunch of Miller High Life 40's. The second choice might make you think that buying this would still be a good idea. I am here to tell you, it's not. I do have a lot of color in my hair--and the color has been stripped a few times and then colored over but even with all that my hair was kind of healthy. Not so much anymore. It looks dry and they curls look sad and I had to go and chop off 2 inches of hair that was damaged after using this. 2 inches is traumatic. (just ask a guy who is 4 inches vs the average 6 inches---those 2 inches are traumatic)
Here is where I admit to how socially retarded I am---especially with the boys. Saturday night after a few too many cocktails after an amazing dinner at my neighbor's house, I thought it was a really good idea to invite the boy over for more cocktails. Never mind that I like to go to bed around 11pm because I am 33 going on 73. And never mind that 5k race at 9am. Nope. Invite the boy over and sit on the porch drinking beers until 2:30 am. Because good things usually happen at 2:30 am. (I was trying to get my priorities on track.) Ignore boy when he goes in to bedroom and asks if there is air conditioning in there. I am apparently so clueless, boy decides to go home. Maybe if he would have asked me to his dorm room to listen to Dave Matthews' new cd would I have caught on. But nope, totally clueless. I have the boy in my house....and nothing. Nothing. He was a bit tipsy, I was a bit tipsy. And I went to bed alone-well not totally alone, Bacon got the other half the bed. (and yes, I do realize that the pup should not be sleeping in my bed and two that I am getting dangerously close to being a crazy dog lady) Seriously, when did I turn in to a 16 year old prude? God help us all if I think that behavior is ever going to work to get a boy naked....
And on a side note, mixing 5 different cocktails, getting very little sleep, and running (or attempting to run) a 5k in 96% humidity is not a good idea. It won't end well. And you will stink up the joint literally and figuratively.
If you asked my co-workers, a couple of them might tell you that my priorities are a little askew. No, my work isn't slipping. My workouts aren't slipping either. And that's what they are saying the problem is...it's been over a week since the first contact with an old "friend" and I have picked sleeping and working out over sleepovers and cuddle time. (and one co-worker wants you to know it's been a while so I really should get on that...pun intended. Yeah, she's the same one that critiques my outfits and makeup. And no, we don't hate her.)
Saturday night I was driving home and saw a car hit the sidewalk/bridge on Alger heading over 90. He hit the curb, jacked up his car pretty good, then kept going. Running the red light at Lakewood Heights and Alger. I was going to follow them to get their license plate and call the cops but I figured it was safer to just go home and figured the car wasn't going to get much further. The car seemed to leave a few things behind that were still there this morning. They even left a sort of snail trail of car fluids. But I think that large spring is kind of important, no?
Sunday morning I got up crazy early to go cheer on two of my friends as they took on their newest challenge, a duathlon. It was a 3 mile run, 25 mile bike ride, 3 mile run. I am not going to tell you I was inspired by this event, I don't think you are going to see me out there next year. But look how chipper they looked before the race....at 7am!
Here they go on the start of their race....
After the start of their race, I headed to the beach to check out the start of the triathlon. Look how many people, and what an absolutely gorgeous day it was.
Jessica and Chuck finishing up their first run. They are still looking pretty happy...I am still thinking they are kind of crazy.
After they hopped on the bike, I headed back to the beach to watch the swimmers exit the water. They were burping and snotting and didn't look like they were having a good time at all. I am a swimmer and even to me this looked like no fun. (I did see my friend, Jen, come out of the water so that was fun and a bit random!)
Some random dude on this bike....
They didn't close down the park so there were some random walkers on the trails. And I did almost see a biker get hit by a truck who didn't see him while on the course. But all in all it seemed like a pretty good day for people. Jessica and Chuck were happy even at the end. And I really think they are crazy.
As a result of spending the entire morning at the park, my run was pushed until mid-afternoon. And it sucked...all 3.5 miles of it. And I was SLOW. But considering the pain I have been in all week, it wasn't as bad as it could have been. And we're back to Monday.
This car was in the parking lot of the race...and if I do say so myself, this person is a total slacker.
Wednesday I received an email from a totally different boy that I used to make-out with's email. (look at me all popular with the mens. They can always leave, but they are coming back-eventually. I am irresistible. I got skillz. Moving on... Where's that sarcasm font when you need it? I am declaring August "Crawl out of the woodwork" month.) Except the email wasn't from him...it said it was from his fiance. And the gist of it included requesting I no longer contact him...DONE! (haven't heard from him in months and nor have I tried to contact him-I've been on lockdown, repenting for the sins of the Summer of 2007 apparantly-I even had deleted his email address because the new droid added that to my contacts in the phone, thanks lady for putting it back in my gmail contacts. DELETE.) She also managed to call her husband-to-be a "bastard" in the email--that's a good sign for their marriage. And she made sure to throw in that he left me for her. Hey thanks Captain Obvious.
This morning I realized I was getting older. Was it the 5:30am workout? Was it creaking joints/sore muscles? Was it the Glucosamine, Fish Oil, Vitamin D cocktail I had with breakfast? Nope, it wasn't any of those things. It was the booty text I received at 10:39pm asking if I was still awake. And I was not. I remember not that long ago when the same texts, from the same person, came in a bit later-like 2am. And I was awake--and usually willing to participate in some after hours drinking and the like. Now he has to text before 11 and still can't catch me awake?!
Karen Small, the chef and owner of the Flying Fig, is going to be opening Market at the Fig: An Urban Pantry right next door to her restaurant in Ohio City. The market will feature light breakfast, lunch and dinner selections as well as specialty items (cheese, meats, wine, beer, pickles and jams).
The opening date hasn't been announced yet (as far as I know) but the hours are supposed to be 10a-10p, Tuesday-Sunday. (2523 Market Ave, Cleveland)
There will also be two, exclusive to the Market, Lilly Handmade Chocolateflavors: Bombay Bark (white chocolate with madras curry, coconut, pistachios & black lava salt) and Flying Fig Bar (dark chocolate with black mission figs, dark roast coffee infusion, five spice & salted pistachios). I cannot wait!
Just when you have totally forgotten about a person, there they are in your Facebook inbox, requesting to be your friend...along with an email that states "Yo...Suzanne...It's (name he goes by inserted here, like I didn't know who it was by his real name after 6 years of hanging out so thanks for the clarification)...what's up?..."
My friend, Justine, sent me this video from a recent local newscast. And she just so happens to be in the video...she's the bride! (And I love her hair, makeup, and dress. Congratulations, Justine and Jim!)
The other night one of my friends was saying how it annoys her that people store stuff in their bras. And I had to admit to her, I am one of those people. Now having said that, I don't go out to bars with my id and cash stuffed in there. I mean I might just tuck my key in there while I am running (and I used to tuck my ipod at the top until I sweat so much during a run it caused my ipod to stop working---awesome being a sweaty beast, yes it is). Or my cell phone tucks in neatly at the top on my way out the door. But I don't store lipsticks or credit cards (ok, maybe just that once) in there.
But if you wanted to store gum, credit cards, lipstick, etc, there is a product for you.
Yesterday my friend Eric posted on Facebook that he was heading to drag softball. I just had to invite myself to this...and invite myself I did. And this photo may or ma¥ not sum up what a fun time it was. How can you go wrong with a 40 of the High Life, a set of bleachers, a ton of new BFF's, and some softball players dressed in drag? (Oh and an Elivis t-shirt)
I can't remember if he is Buffy or Muffy...
And we have Avatar...
Between innings, they stopped the game for a musical number.
Lady Gaga's Bad Romance was my favorite.
The umpire had some of the best legs I have seen...woman or man.
And she was like 7 feet tall so there is a lot of leg going on.
There were not a lot of vaginas at the park but they sure liked to talk about them. The cheerleaders from the other team even threw some douche at the fans.
I loved the cheerleaders. I am sad I didn't get my photo taken with them.
That 40 of High Life got around. But isn't that the nature of the beast?!
And Eugene looks fantastic as a blonde.
The travelling Elvis glasses made their appearance at Twist last night.
It was their first Cleveland outing.
This year was the 5 annual Drag Ball softball game and my first time ever attending. It was really fun and I think I will be adding this to my calendar of events that are not to be missed.